I take myself on dates. I go to the movies alone. I wander museums alone. I eat meals alone (and yes, that means I resist all temptation to scroll through Instagram while waiting for my meal). I sit in coffee shops and journal alone. I take the train and go to new towns and walk around alone.
我跟自己去约会:我独自看电影,独自在博物馆闲逛,独自吃饭(是的,这是说在等待饭菜上来时,我抵制住所有刷Instagram的诱惑)。我坐在咖啡馆里,独自写着日志。我一个人乘火车,前往新的城镇,然后独自在那里四处走走玩玩。
I realize this may sound super dorky. You're probably thinking that I must be pretty weird and very lonely. Interestingly enough, I was way more lonely before I started spending time alone. The feeling like I needed to be around people all the time to take a deep breath -- that was loneliness. The feeling of complete anxiety and fear when a boyfriend broke up with me -- that was loneliness. But this? This is peace. This is fun. This is what self-esteem is built of. Here's how I learned to spend time alone.
我意识到也许这听起来超级蠢。你很可能会想,我肯定十分怪异、非常寂寞。有趣的是,我在开始独自生活前是更加孤单的。那种就像我需要一直跟别人待在一起才能做深呼吸的感觉,是孤单。男朋友跟我分手,那种极为焦虑恐慌的感受,是寂寞。但现在这种场景呢?这是平静,是趣味,是构建自信心的基础。以下是我学会独处的方法。